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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Poetry of the Mad's LiveJournal:

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Friday, February 22nd, 2013
11:25 am
Sickled Love
Point a small gun in the air
The trigger Man feeds grossly
He says to the trembling bodies
"Do you feel this fear?"

The trigger Man says -
"Can you feel the sense of agony?"
"Do you wish to help yourselves?"
The trigger Man aims the bullet womb under his jaw

The trigger Man says -
"I am going to shoot myself,
Do you not fear for yourselves any more,
now that you are safe?"
The trigger Man is crying

The trigger Man says -
"Do you wish to save me?"
Trembling bodies watch , a few tears fall,
a few faces frozen, too few understand.
The trigger Man is angry now

"Feel this pain, this sorrow?"
"I wish to save the humans, I wish to help move forward,
not backwards"
"Too many souls that are unware, glued to their phones,
their computers, their television."
"So much agression, so many false kings, so few

The trigger Man screams -
The trigger Man squeezes -

Blood on the celing
Nobody understands
Thursday, March 1st, 2012
8:07 pm

Fly away, 

Silently singing

Freedom searching 

Take flight on wings 

Made of stardust and cloud

Escape the dirty, taunting man

Let your aspirations be your guide into the unknown 

Let your sorrow keep you adrift 

Oh, sweet sparrow, whose voice haunts my soul 

Why do you touch the ground 

When you could live amongst clouds instead?

Are humans more fun to watch

Are they more fun to tease?

With their heads in the clouds 

And meager thoughts flying about

Like deformed children

They grow into monsters 

And they take

Never giving 

Are you disgusted by our useless 


The fire or touching the sun

The lips pressed to windows

Eyes searching for answers 

Where there are no questions

 Yes, we must seem so silly to you

And cruel as well

Is it wrong to you that we blind you 

Ad make you sing?

I’m sure you must not mind much, 

For it takes a willing subject to be caught 

By unskilled men’s hands

But sparrow 

If I could

I’d leave with you 

And leave this disserted  no mans land

To forever be in your grace


Goodbye until we meet again

I will always look to you as a friend 

Sunday, December 25th, 2011
2:51 am
periscope upward toward suface hasn't yet reached
in the middle somewhere in time didn't want to know too clear rather be here this way stillness illusion quietude though not real scene to be true could feel it as if it were next to nothing that could break through

Current Mood: scopeful
Sunday, September 4th, 2011
1:02 am

Live in here
Hear, take me up to my brain
Leave the trees, left to borrow
Leaves for branches
Gift of reason,
Fault of chances.
Live in the possibilities
From then up here
Destroy any grants of
Oxygen purposely
Give them all their land
Body like a soul like a soul
Caught untrustworthy
Live in here.
Hear? Live in here
Who are you?
Brought in me?
My dead grandmothers,
Own insanity
Soul, you made me
So live inside of me
Peel the outer me
Bloom the butterfly

Current Mood: high
Wednesday, May 18th, 2011
1:14 am
I am not a vase
Entered and Filled,
perpetuating life and joy.
Superficially useful - nearly invisible.
replaceable and irreparable.

Current Mood: uncomfortable
Thursday, May 12th, 2011
1:25 pm
Moment of seasons
Changes of time,
difference in season.
Vibrant spring,
burning summer,
shifting fall,
cool winter,
all tied together.
Things may change,
but just that moment,
that moment of life,
is truly eternal.

Current Mood: contemplative
Monday, April 11th, 2011
11:37 am
The Stone

My life is set in stone.
Will it ever change?
What have I missed?
What could have been?
All the paths not taken,
All the roads not travelled.
What waited for me,
Had I chosen them instead?
Am I happy as I am?
Like stagnant water,
Never moving.
Always the same.
Or am I just wishing?
Wishing for things that will never be?
Can I change the stone now?
Dare I change it now?
Do I really want to change what’s written?
All these questions shall remain unanswered.
For fear keeps me stagnant.
Fear of change, fear of life.
Fear of myself.

Current Mood: blah
Monday, December 13th, 2010
12:21 pm
'cigarette lighter waving'
cigarette lighter waving
you are willing to
   submit abysmally to abysses to
   end suffering but only
dark + motes of dust in high beams
you are willing to
   take any and all flack lying
   down, fucked anklewise kneedeep in
              -broomstick + all,
broomstick + all,
pentagram neatly wedged in the cleft of your tits

cigarette waving patiently
smoke in the highbeams, i am willing to
publish your obscenities, whore of the age
of poetry

Dec 13 / 10
Saturday, December 11th, 2010
6:41 pm
Breaking Hours
Each second lives on in hell
Forever stuck inside this jail
I rattle my cage
Turning towards every so called sage
Is there a cure? Will I see tomorrow?
All I feel is my own sorrow
Darkness falls and my eyes stare above
Remembering those moments covered in love
Echoes and scratches abound
Tattering little sounds
How will I ever be
Just the girl known as me

Current Mood: blank
Tuesday, November 16th, 2010
2:38 am
If i put myself in danger. im sorry. i gravitate towards the noise.
The silence shakes me and the cold it breaks my eyes of glass turquoise
guess my heart dont stop just cos my pocket watch does. hands remain in perfect poise

im standing in harms way. im sorry. i move towards the light               
Pitch black annoys me. no sight destroys my soul, sets my orange thread alight
guess the world isn't still just cos my pocket watch is. useless cos the times not right
Sunday, November 14th, 2010
3:42 am
Let me
let me lick the poison of your chapped lips
let me choke
Let me breath in your toxic fumes surrounded by bitter lies
And your green glass  eyes
and your broke
cold hands draw my blood break my bones
Let me sleep
Let your stare suffocate me and that knife penetrate me
lets go deep
Use your bitten  fingernails to open up my string veins
I like the pain
Let your touch paralyze me and your hands take me by the throat
get your coat
leave me drowning in your smile
and your words
they make me hazy drive me crazy
Let me burn
hold me down leave me gasping then revive
Just fucking drive
im relying on you to keep me alive
Thursday, October 21st, 2010
10:33 pm
right behind you

when you shut your eyes and jump
land on the ground with a almighty thump
when your ribs break
and your voice shakes
cos it dont matter when your spine shatters
when your heart stops
and your blood drops
when you bend your knees and  fly
just know that i
am right behind you
Tuesday, October 12th, 2010
12:08 am
Problem child
i make the teachers sigh and my grandma tut
the preach to me when they should just keep shut
they tryna tell me i need to see a shrink
like i really give a shit bout what they think

antidepressants and alcohol make me fucking wild
people look down there noses cos i am a
And this problem cant be solved

I made my momma cry and my daddy broke
they dont approve of all this shit that i smoke
tryna send me to a counselor cos they think i gots issues
they got suspicious ever since they saw the blood on those tissues

They dont know that i cut they think im just rebelling
if that's the way they like it then i aint telling
i might ramble on bout how im misunderstood
but your precious little girl just likes to see her own blood

antidepressants and alcohol make me fucking wild
people look down there noses cos i am a
And this problem cant be solved

I dont go to school and i dont have a job
and maybe too much bullshit comes out of my gob
i could fix my life but im too busy feeling
so empty and tired and my head is still reeling

i make the teachers sigh and my grandma tut
the preach to me when they should just keep shut
i cut
i cut
i cut
they tryna tell me i need to see a shrink
like i really give a shit bout what they think

antidepressants and alcohol make me fucking wild
people look down there noses cos i am a
And this problem cant be solved
cos 2 plus too dont equal 4

2 plus 2 equals cut now bitch
Monday, September 20th, 2010
1:26 pm
Left you, Abandoned

My body's an empty house, the staircase of my spine is splintered
watch your step
the floorboards are rotten and water logged with words of disease.
Creaky house, facing the cliffs, the drop off is far,
instead of pushing...
Could you lend me a hand, a kind face turned cruel. Weather erodes tree trunks into old souls.
Broken eyes,
you see through. Shattered windows remind me of lost hope.
The shingles are deteriorating, the angel's tears fall from the star beds above,
the voice of beauty.
It hurts your ears to hear the truth;
that I'm leaving.
The void is unsettling, old pictures in the attic left to gather dust.
You can't remember anything, you can't keep everything, nothing lasts forever.
The house engulfs in flames

Current Mood: nostalgic
Sunday, September 19th, 2010
12:04 am
i built my face from paper mache
drew on two eyes and a nose made of clay
my mouth cut out from a magazine
my dirty cheeks were now wiped clean
stretched cotton skin around my bones
that are made from milk and pebble stones
a stomach a chest from a metal sheet
my lungs and heart bought as pig meat
my limbs tree branches string joints held tight
i put on my old clothes and went out to the night
as i stand here robotic rebuilt by the mud
i know i did the best i could
Saturday, September 11th, 2010
10:26 am
Trickling by little trickle
The sky does what I cannot
Words catch in my throat in a tickle
Trying to employ what I've been taught
The rain falls, releasing all
Never can I find my ground
Nor stand tall
I just so wish to be with body, soul, and mind sound

Current Mood: guilty
Monday, September 6th, 2010
1:02 am
He picked me
like a strawberry
becuase i was the ripest apple from his tree
the sugar in his tea
you said you'll see
everything will be fine
becuase you're mine
you're the biggest grape from the rotting vine
you're my star, you shine
my favorite song, my favorite line
i was chose
like the reddest rose
A sweet smell under your nose
the whistle when the wind blows
the sunlight
a coat on the coldest night
but he dosent see
my fragility
my cracked and broken misery
he thinks he's the plaster on my scraped knee
he cant fix this
its a miss
his ignorance is bliss
and with each kiss
im poisoning his life and his soul
He'll never fill that hole
nor reach his goal
he said don't worry ill show you it will be OK
i didn't believe it and i didn't know what to say
He picked me i am the peach
climbed a ladder becuase he couldn't reach
he picked me
like a strawberry
And like the sugar in his tea
i dissolved
Wednesday, September 1st, 2010
6:34 pm
Ten thousand piece jigsaw puzzle
wanna be a work of art,
a fucking masterpiece
hang me on your wall
right above the fireplace
wear me round your neck
im a antique
limited edition
a one in a a billion freak
wanna be an  award winning novel
24 different  languages
Wanna be on the front page
not backstage
small black bird in a cage
wanna be a light in the sky
a fucking shining star
make your wish
ill give you the bizarre
im lightning
an expedition
a whole new experience frightening
no tradition
wanna be on display in Tate
stapled by my wrists
come and stare and remember
tell your friends i exist
Sunday, August 22nd, 2010
2:58 am
 Am I mad to think these things,
To feel the way I feel?
To believe in ghosts and angels
When "reality's" surreal?

The world's interconnected.
Anyone can see;
And I'm here at the centre -
The fat controller - me.

Coincidences don't exist.
The planet's pre-arranged.
Smoke some dope and clench my fist -
It's the others what's deranged.

The T.V.'s telepathic.
The postman's K.G.B.
The radio's empathic.
There's arsenic in my tea.

The junk-mails full of messages.
Mossad's been in touch?
There's anthrax in my sausages
Life really is too much!

The gas-man's come from M.I.5.
His eyes electric blue.
What to do to stay alive?
There's cameras in the loo.

I must out on a mission -
The world, my soul, to save.
No manic intermission.
I'm bold! I'm free! I'm brave!

The sky above is orange;
The street below is black.
The life I live is free-range;
But there's a devil on my back.

Smash a window! Break the spell!
Get the "Busies" swarming.
Crazy antics in a cell.
Sectioned early morning.

Interrogated, medicated,
Movements now staccato.
Worst of all humiliated.
Just what the fuck then are you?

You're no Satan! You're no Christ!
You're just another number.
"You're brains, my dear, they must be sliced!"
Do they come much dumber?

You? Commander of the Gods?
What a crazy notion.
You've lost your clothes, you stupid sod!
And caused a great commotion!

We're all mistaken so they say
At some time or another.
Just one more long schizoid day -
Blame it on my mother!

Current Mood: zzzzzz
Saturday, July 3rd, 2010
11:54 pm

i knew you'd be the death of me
you can't hold onto this forever
but you're gonna try
i want to rip you out of my heart
(rip you up)
but something keeps me still
i love you
and you repeat it back to me
but sometimes
it feels like a lie
hate will burn you
and i'll be numb to your pain

Current Mood: crushed
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